INTERVIEW with SCOTT PECK
"The Happiest Married Man on Earth"
Speaking Out on
"Our Spiritual Right to Perfect Love"
Introduction: This is an interview with Scott Peck, author of the just-released book, "The Love You Deserve: 10 Keys to Perfect Love".
Awareness: Scott, you say that you are "the happiest married man on Earth." That's a remarkable claim. How did you manage to get that title?
Scott: To my knowledge, no one else has ever publicly claimed to be the happiest married man on Earth. But I'd be delighted to share the title with anyone else experiencing as much love as I do with Shannon. Our marriage is perpetual heaven.
People who see us together know immediately that we experience something extraordinary together. That's why I wrote "The Love You Deserve: 10 Keys to Perfect Love". I'd like the entire universe to see how wonderful and achievable our love is. Everyone deserves to feel as loved as we do.
Awareness: What exactly does it feel like to be the happiest married man on Earth?
Scott: Well, here's a quick glimpse into my life with Shannon. When I leave this interview and return home, I know with 100% assurance that I'll be entering an environment of kindness and love not most of the time, but all the time! Can you imagine how emotionally satisfying that is? And that's just the beginning! We cherish and support each other's dreams, treat each other with genuine equality, treasure our time together, and truthfully, live in perpetual intimacy. We treat each other as best friends, love-mates, confidants, soul-mates, and spiritual partners.
But I'll tell you, it wasn't always so.
Both Shannon and I experienced earlier marriages where we felt emotionally devastated and depleted. This is a huge reason why we so value each other's unconditional loving kindness.
For example, one of the ten keys in my book, "The Love You Deserve", is about kindness and honesty expressed simultaneously as one force. Why simultaneously? For two good reasons:
Awareness: But is it realistic or possible to experience kindness and honesty all the time? That's hard to imagine.
Scott: Your question couldn't be more on target. One of the leading ideas in "The Love You Deserve" is that we cannot experience love at a higher level than our consciousness can conceive. For example, if we think that perfect love, or continuous kindness and honesty, are impossible, we won't experience them. Not only will we not express this quality of love, but we won't expect others to treat us with the love we deserve.
Do you know that every 12 seconds in the United States, a woman is physically abused? There is, of course, abuse of men as well. This is absolutely intolerable, and society is waking up to this realization.
Yet how often are husbands and wives emotionally abused? This is just as intolerable, even more frequent, and needs to be seen as abuse. It certainly is not love. What percentage of love-mates throughout the world experience some degree of emotional abuse every day of their lives? Our staggering divorce statistics are certainly one indication. The number of struggling relationships we all see around us is another.
Awareness: Is there a real solution to the problem of divorces and struggling relationships?
Scott: There certainly is, but, as Einstein so brilliantly said, "Problems cannot be solved at the same level of awareness that created them." My book, "The Love You Deserve", presents a whole new perspective on the way we look at our intimate love lives. Each of us has the spiritual right to experience perfect love. That statement may seem outrageously bold, but it is the truth. And it is achievable. The 10 keys in my book show, in the most intimate and practical ways, how perfect love can be expressed between two love-mates.
Awareness: With so many failing relationships, how can perfect love be possible, or be a right?
Scott: Less than 100 years ago, women did not have the right to vote. Today, to our more advanced thinking, that seems absurd. Well, what really changed? What caused women to gain the right to vote?
A change in consciousness!
It is always a shift to a higher consciousness that causes us to recognize a new right. An equal shift in consciousness took place in our view of equality during the last half-century.
The right to experience perfect love is already inherent within us just as the right to equality and the right to vote were always inherent within us. But they needed to be recognized and claimed. This is the great opportunity we have today in our love lives.
The perfect love that Shannon and I experience together is a model of the love completely available to anyone. It is time for mankind to wake up to this love!
Awareness: How do we wake up to this right to perfect love?
Scott: It begins with each of us asking a potent question: Do I feel honored, cherished, esteemed, and empowered in my love life?
If the answer is no, it is time to start truly loving yourself and expecting to be honored. One of the most valuable things we can do in our lives is to surround ourselves with friends who honor and cherish is. This enables us to see our innate goodness and feel the emotional freedom to express our inner dreams without fear.
One of the chapters in "The Love You Deserve" is called "Cherishing Each Other's Dreams." I wouldn't even be speaking to you today if Shannon had not cherished my inner dreams and encouraged me to sing my song in this book. When we are surrounded by people who don't cherish our inner dreams, our mental and emotional energies are spent in defense, fear, and doubt rather than in freedom, expression, and joy.
One of the most satisfying results of writing "The Love You Deserve" is to see people's lives change as a result of reading the book. Most people just don't have a clear picture of what real love feels or looks like.
Awareness: What advice do you have for those seeking to find their ideal love-mate?
Scott: Look within yourself and discover your inherent spiritual right to be perfectly loved. The love we all want to experience is not in some place or time outside us, but already within our own awareness. Let me tell you about my own awakening.
In our previous marriages, neither my wife nor I were happy or satisfied. It took 90% of my energy just to contend with the emotional frustration and self-doubt I was experiencing. I felt unhonored and unsure of what to expect when I returned home each day. After many years of emotional suffering, however, I gained the courage to say to her: "We need to either commit to improving our marriage or end the marriage. Which do you want?" To my surprise, she said she had no desire to work on it. Our marriage ended in an amicable divorce.
After the divorce, I assumed that I would remain single for the rest of my life. I certainly knew that being single was far better than being unhappily married. My self-esteem was so low that, even though I thought of myself as an exceptionally loving person, I had no intimate love relationship that verified this.
But a new idea kept growing within my private thinking. I thought to myself:: "I deserve to be well-loved. Why shouldn't I be loved at the same level as I can give love?" This idea continued to expand in my consciousness until one day it burst into truth: "I deserve to be perfectly loved and this is my spiritual right!"
From that instant on, I knew that I would experience perfect love. I had no idea how or with whom. But I had mentally moved into a whole new way of looking at love. I was no longer willing to accept anything less than perfect love, even if it meant being single forever. I knew in my heart that I had experienced a deep healing. Several months later, I met Shannon. I'm now the happiest married man on Earth. In fact, we just celebrated our 57th anniversary of perfect love. (We count by months, not years, because we are so happy together).
Awareness: It almost seems that you have had a deeply spiritual experience!
Scott: That is an understatement! In fact, the 10th key in my book is called "Loving Out from Spirituality."
Rather than thinking that love is something outside us that we need to find or struggle to achieve, an awareness of our innate spirituality enables us to see perfect love as already established within us already available both to express and receive. That's the inner key. In my own love life, it is this spiritual trust in divine Love that led Shannon and me to each other.
There is an extraordinary and widespread spiritual awakening taking place today in collective consciousness and this awakening is going to revolutionize our love lives. I feel immense gratitude to be able to share the love we each deserve with others in a way that is tangible, comforting, and empowering.
"The Love You Deserve "is available in bookstores, and is also available, in book or audiobook, directly from Lifepath Publishing: 1 (800) 266-1525. Scott also maintains a website, www.ScottPeck.com with information about workshops.
For further information: Contact: Collier Kaler, Publicist Life-path Publishing (619) 792-6018, Fax (619) 792-7114, or Scott Peck, (619) 793-8200.
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