By Lynn Seiser, Ph.D
The Passive Path To Personal Prosperity
The passive path to personal prosperity. That statement sounds like a tall, if not impossible, promise. I do not offer it as a promise. I can, however, offer it as a very real possibility. To make it possible, one must understand what the passive path to personal prosperity really means. Please, allow me to explain.
What do I mean by passive? Think for a moment about a time you were very happy or totally into what you were doing. How busy were you in your mind? Most people have to admit they were very busy in their mind when they were the most miserable. They also have to admit that when they were the happiest, they were barely in their mind at all. We do not have to do anything to be happy. We have to do a lot to be miserable. By passive, I mean that state of noninterference of the mind that talks us out of what we really want in life. Passive does not mean you do not have to do anything. That is entitlement. Entitlement is an attitude or belief that will almost guarantee you will never get what you really want. By passive, I mean we have to stop doing what has never worked to get what is already ours. Passive is stop-doing those actions, or holding on to those beliefs that have no potential of being successful. Passive means getting out of our own way. You have to do something mentally to feel unworthy of prosperity. You do not have to do anything to be worthy.
What do I mean by path? Think of where you are now and where you would like to be. Now draw a line from here to there. That is your path. Anything that falls on that line will be in the direction you want to go. Anything that does not fall on that line will take you away from what is important to you. Many people sit where they are and wait for prosperity to find them. It is as if you are sitting on a corner waiting for the bus knowing there is no bus stop there. Walk down the street to where the bus stop is. I often ask people three questions. The first is what do you truly want. It is surprising how few people know the answer and still wonder why they never get what it is they do not know they want. The second question is what do you have to do to get it. This is the path. Know what direction you have to take. The third is not really a question. It is a statement. Then do it. If you know where the path is, and where it leads you, you still have to take a walk.
What do I mean by personal? Each of us is a different person, with a different history, and with different lessons to learn. Yes, I know I often write about the importance of sameness as a unifying common denominator to access empathy and compassion. Personal means to acknowledge that there are differences. This does not mean that what you want is right and someone else’s life goals are wrong. It does not mean your goals are good and others are bad. Some people believe that their own personal preferences are the right ones and the good ones. Implied is that if ours do not agree we are wrong and bad. This is judgement. Judgement, like entitlement, will usually guarantee failure. It is okay to want what you want and for others to want something entirely different. If the wants match, you may find yourselves on similar paths. The paths will cross or merge for a period. If your wants do not match, the paths may cross, but seldom will they merge despite all of our well-meaning efforts. Do not take it too personally if wants and paths do not match. If others want something different than you do, that is about their personal preferences, not about you. Yes, the opposite is also true, they do not have to live up to your personal preferences.
What do I mean by prosperity? The word prosperity literally means successful and wealthy. Success means a favorable outcome, getting what you set out to get. Wealth usually means financial success or monetary riches. In a larger sense, prosperity means being successful at getting what one values. Closely tied to the concept of prosperity is the concept of abundance. One of the major blocks to prosperity is a belief in scarcity. Many people simply believe there is not enough to go around and they are personally unworthy of receiving. Abundance means there is more than enough to go around and each of us must choose to do what it takes to claim our part. Claiming our part does not take from others. In fact, it gives to others. It gives them a model to help them believe it is possible for them too. Look around us. Do we really have a scarcity problem or do we have a distribution problem? I think the distribution problem is that too many people believe in scarcity. To be prosperous, open to abundance.
Thanks for listening, for the opportunity to be of service, and for sharing the passive path to personal prosperity on this journey.
Lynn Seiser, Ph.D., is an internationally respected psychotherapist in Seal Beach, CA with more than twenty years of direct clinical experience in recovery counseling for offenders and victims of violence, trauma and abuse. He is known for his work in “holistic” recovery from addictions with an emphasis on “healthy relationships”. Lynn is a consultant, speaker and writer and may be contacted at (562) 799-1371. You may check out his website at www.members.aol.com/SeiserL/index.html
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