By Lynn Seiser, Ph.D.



If You Were Your Own Angel

Sue came into my office. As usual, she expressed her stress and depression. We talked about what was going on in her life. We had already spent a great deal of time disclosing and discussing her past. Sue learned to control her thinking and in turn changed the way she felt about many aspects of her life. She still felt something was missing. She felt there was no light at the end of the tunnel. She saw no real future of love and happiness. With her head in her hands, she cried and wished an angel to come into her life.

The wish for divine intervention is common. I asked Sue what an angel could do for her. She wanted an angel to swoop down and take her away from all the stress of her day-to-day life. She wanted an angel to protect her. She wanted an angel to give her wisdom and tell her the right thing to do with her life. She wanted an angel to be a friend and just eliminate her loneliness. She hoped an angel would appear to her.

I suggested that she actually saw an angel several times a day — she just did not recognize her. There were many angels around her at all times. I am not sure if we each have a special one assigned to us or if they are just there for us. It depends on us to see them, not for them to show themselves. I told Sue the first exercise in seeing angels is to look into the mirror and see the angel inside herself. She smiled. She knew where I was heading and a part of her knew I was right.

I asked Sue where an angel would take her if it did swoop down and take her away from all the stress of her day-to-day life. She was surprised to find she did not really know where, just close to the beach. She had always loved the beach but did not spend much time there anymore. I asked her what the angel would do about the stress of her everyday life. After all, we tend to take that stuff with us. Sue began to identify the stress in her life. She remembered we had discussed stress as two conflicting or contradictory thoughts within ourselves. We discussed resolving her own internal conflict before letting the angel take her away. She decided not to wait for the angel. She started making plans to move closer to the beach.

We began to discuss the request for angels to protect her. I expressed my affinity for the archangels like Michael who was more the warrior type. We both laughed as we remembered scenes form the John Travolta movie “Michael”. My favorite scene was when he looked up and simply said, “I’m not that type of angel.” He meant that he was not just tender loving care — he would do battle. We laughed harder remembering him running head on into a bull yelling “Battle”. Sue began to talk about the things in her life where she felt unprotected. On some level, she began to realize that she already knew what and who threatened her. Some of her fears came because she really believed certain people were out to do her harm. I supported her belief that some people probably were. She also began to see that many of her fears were just a function of her own fantasies about what might happen. She was scaring herself. Rather than be afraid, Sue decided to protect herself.

Sue wanted an angel to talk to her, to give her wisdom, and to tell her the right things to do. This part was simple. We reviewed what we had already gone over. She recognized that she already knew what to do, but it was easier to believe the answers were not directly coming from her. They were a part of some divine intervention. Instead of external, to be seen with her eyes and heard with her ears, they were internally felt with her heart.

Lastly, we discussed Sue’s loneliness. She remembered that I had once told her that mental and emotional health was being okay with yourself when you were alone. Spiritual health knew that you were never alone. As we talked more, Sue saw it was her choice in friends and relationships that left her feeling alone. She wanted love from people who just were not giving it to her. Sue cried as she admitted this. However, she also admitted, it was not really a surprise. She knew she needed to let go of some people. She knew she was worthy of a loving relationship. She added, “We all are.”

As Sue left the session, she smiled, and said she now could see the angel everyday in the mirror.

Thanks for listening, for the opportunity to be of services, and for sharing the angel in us all as we share this journey.

Lynn Seiser, Ph.D., is an internationally respected psychotherapist in Seal Beach, CA with more than twenty years of direct clinical experience in recovery counseling for offenders and victims of violence, trauma and abuse. He is known for his work in “holistic” recovery from addictions with an emphasis on “healthy relationships. Lynn is a consultant, speaker and writer and may be contacted at (562) 799-1371. Check out his website at   

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