By Laura V. Hyde
We are offered no greater opening to know the truth of who we truly are than in relationship. Relationships are such powerful catalysts because they mirror the aspects we most need revealed for our soul-growth. What we see and react to in another, we possess within ourselves. Thus both the fear and love we see on another’s face is the reflection of both our own humanness and divinity. Even during the most challenging times our soul is able to thrive since our encounters with others are our greatest opportunities for growth.
Our relationships flourish when we are willing to show up and be fully present. Too often, we allow ourselves to divert onto other things when we’re around the people we love the most. How often, after many years of being together, do people simply grow apart? While counseling couples, I’ve witnessed a common theme where the woman has attended to the home and children and the man has focused on earning a living, only to discover that when retirement rolls around, they no longer know each other!
When our relationships become stale and predictable, it’s either because we are not honoring them for the temples of healing they are, or we’re not delving inward toward our own soul where our passion runs deep. This reminds me of a conversation I had with a woman who was complaining her life was lacking pizzazz. “The 1960’s was a period with a lot more excitement. The peace marches were really something. Today’s demonstrations are boring in comparison,” she stated.
Yes, the 60’s were a time of much upheaval. There was a lot of trail blazing occurring which was necessary to get us where we are today. Revolutionary thinking was key during that time, but evolutionary thinking is required today. And that’s a good thing. While there was much being done on the outer planes during the 60’s, there is much being created on the inner planes today. We now understand the staggering power of our thoughts, which for many, has led to an entirely new way of being, and living.
So, perhaps this person was feeling bored within her relationships including the relationship with herself. Not because there’s less excitement in the air, but simply because she was playing it safe and not stretching beyond her comfort zones?
Abandonment, rejection, withdrawal — these kinds of fears prevent us from extending and receiving love. And in truth, they only cause us to reject and abandon ourselves. The only real pain we will ever feel stems from withholding our love. In reality, all love already resides within us. And since we have an infinite wellspring from which to give, how could we ever truly be without love? This reminds me of a beautiful quote I once read from an anonymous source that affirmed, “You can never lose by loving; you can only lose by holding back.”
Notice your relationships, especially those people you’re closest to. Are you seeing them as precious vehicles for growth? Are the people in your life a priority or do you allow diversions to keep you from connecting with them? This includes your family and “family” is any group of people that has joined together out of mutual respect and support of one another.
When we don’t allow ourselves to connect on a heart level with another it’s because we’re afraid of love. Amazing isn’t it? Here we are beings of love underneath all of our “stuff,” yet love is the very thing that scares us the most. The belief that love is limited and conditional is what keeps us from connecting deeply with each other. This reminds me of a beautiful passage that Robert Perry, the founder of the Circle of Atonement based upon the principles of A Course in Miracles, once wrote:
Because I believe love has limits, I have come to be afraid of it: afraid it will be withdrawn, afraid of its conditions, afraid that what seems to be love is only a tease, a tantalizing promise that threatens to disappear if I misbehave. That fear, that constant anxiety over love’s potential for disappearance is the source of my lack of joy. How can I be joyful, even when things are “good,” if love may be withdrawn at any moment? This is the error of our minds we are practicing to uncover, bring to the light, and let go of. Right now, in this moment, I am encircled by His embrace. Right now, without a single thing changing, the Love of God radiates to me without limit and without reservation or question. To know this is happiness, and it is this I seek today.
The heartfelt wisdom of these words is a powerful reminder for each of us. Love is eternal; we need not fear losing the love of another. Love is within us, it’s what we are and nothing will ever change that fact. There is no mistake you have made or error so great that could alter the truth. Dare to go beyond your fear and embrace the love available to you with all of your heart and soul. The power of love is staggering; it has the ability to heal addictions, cure disease, transform past pain into present happiness, and dramatically shift the situation that exists within the world today. Love is the glue that holds our universe together and is the reason we exist. Never underestimate its potency or presence. It’s inside of you, it’s inside of me, it’s everywhere.
Laura V. Hyde is a nationally acclaimed author, speaker and teacher. Founder of Infinite Wisdom, an organization dedicated to the highest human capacity, she provides spiritual counseling, soul purpose coaching, and numerous workshops for awakening the heart and spirit. Laura is the author of the books “Gifts of the Soul” and “The Intimate Soul,” a syndicated columnist for more than 20 publications and a student of A Course in Miracles. A frequently requested keynote speaker, Laura is available for speaking engagements throughout the U.S. and Canada. Please visit Laura at: www.laurahyde.com or e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org
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