MY ONION PI
By Paula Hamilton

It's Only About Sex
. . . or Is It?

 

This whole big flap about Bill and Monica has really got me thinking. Why the obviously reluctant impeachment process, why the bending of the rules and the rush to get it over with, why all this hurry to historically sweep it under the rug?

Is it that we are so uncomfortable with sex and sexuality, as the Europeans claim? Is it that we don't want to tip the sound economic boat, as the economists claim? Is it that it's just partisanship, as the Democrats claim? Or is it that Lying is the unspoken Great American Transgression?

Now, before you get all high horsey with me, I'm including myself in that category. We all lie. Even those of us who don't like lying, don't want to lie, don't want our children lying, don't like being lied to ‹ lie. Ever call in sick when you really weren't that ill? Or weren't ill at all? Ever not tell the cashier that she rang up an item far under what the price actually was?

How about those tax deductions, or that expense account? What about that wedding, or baby shower that you really didn't want to go to? How many grandmothers have died several times as an excuse for not being able to do something? Ever sell your old used car, or house and leave out some of the unnecessary details?

How about the maneuvering we do when a friend asks us our opinion of her new dress, or his new tie, or worse yet, their haircuts! White, black or other color, out of kindness, spite, selfishness, or generosity, a lie is a lie; and we all do it.

So maybe, having Bill up there redefining lying is making us just a little uncomfortable. I mean talk about lying about lying . . . he's pretty good even for a politician! Maybe this is making us as a nation tweak a little. Our casual view of bending the truth allows such entities as Madison Avenue and the Stock Market to exist. Yes, lie to us, lie to us, we know you're doing it, but I really want to believe this toothpaste will transform my life, and this Internet stock will put me on the road to easy street.

Where Europeans take a casual view of sex and extramarital affairs, Americans seem to favor bending, twisting, coloring, enhancing, downplaying, concealing, rearranging, modifying, segmenting and tailoring the truth. Whether it's to suit ourselves or for the benefit of others (or is that a big lie too?) we are a nation of truth embroiderers. Maybe what we really don't want to impeach him for, is for doing what we all do, too. Think about it. But, remember it's just my onion pi.


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